Reflection after being home for two weeks
It's been almost a year since I was laid off last summer. After having spent the past seven months traveling in Asia, I finally came come about two weeks ago. Reintegrating into life back home has had its ups and downs, just like anything else.
Some observations and reflections on the last two weeks:
Time goes by really quickly. I think that everyday life here goes by faster than when I was traveling. Maybe it's because I'm trying to get setting into a schedule, but I'm shocked that two weeks has flown by. Sometimes I don't start thinking about what I have to get done in a given week until the week is already over. I want to be more intentional with what I do in a day so that I don't find myself having accomplished nothing in a couple of months.
As I reorient to life back home, my time is focused on a few things. This includes selectively applying to / interviewing for jobs, trading, learning how to code, and working on a few other projects.
I wake up naturally. I was waking up really early when I was first back due to jetlag, starting the day as early at 5am. Nowadays, I wake up between 7am-8am without an alarm clock and for the first time in my life, I can say I'm genuinely excited to wake up and start my day. This time last year, I would lay in bed as long as possible, dreading the thought of getting up to sign onto my work computer.
Another clue that I enjoy life more is that I don't spend 3-4 hours at night watching Netflix like a zombie. I largely don't watch TV unless I'm working out or watching something with my family. Even if I do watch TV, it isn't the way I used to mindlessly do so to escape my real life.
Health doesn't just come to us--it has to be a daily, active choice. When I first came back, I wasn't exercising consistently and it was easy to deprioritize. I got sick within the first few days of coming back--likely having caught something on the long plane ride home--and it was a reminder that health is not a guaranteed. I went and got my annual physical done last week and am focused on eating balanced meals, exercising consistently, and sleeping well.
I miss Korea and want to find a long-term way of integrating it into my normal life. There are so many things I miss about living in Seoul. Whether it's the ability to hop on the bus or subway and go anywhere or discovering a new neighborhood or cafe, I miss the life of exploring Seoul. There are certain things like specific food and drink, skincare procedures, and cultural events that you just can't get here in the US. At the very least, I'd like to spend a couple of weeks in Korea every year. I also would like to apply for a visa so that I have more flexibility coming and going to Korea and ultimately would love to buy an apartment in Seoul to use when I visit.
I want to live a good life, as defined by me. I recently had someone tell me that I am too intelligent to waste my brain on trading and he insisted that I should get a PhD and become a professor. He recalled a time when my family briefly lived with them while our house was being fixed and while his kids and my sister were playing after school, I was the only one diligently working on my homework. He said ever since then, he always thought I would do something great. I've lived my whole life in search of what it means to be great and successful and none of things I've done in those veins have made me happy. Whether I decide to trade full-time or do something else, I want to choose. I want to be brave enough to do what makes me happy. It's harder to do that back home with the pressure and expectations of my family and social circle watching me, but I finally feel ready to take a chance on myself.
I'd love to hear how your June went and what observations you've noticed in your own life. Here's to a beautiful upcoming month ahead.