The joys and wants of trading

It’s been about six months since I have been a full time trader and investor (hooray!). For the most part, I really enjoy it and am pleasantly surprised by why. One of the best parts of this work is just how much there is to learn and how many different opinions people have. The same economic data could come out and be interpreted ten different ways. Different investors and fund managers all have different theses on where the market is and where it is headed. I find myself constantly looking to read, listen to podcasts and interviews, and stay up to date with economic and world news. For someone like me who loves to learn, is endlessly curious, and likes to work alone, this work suits me quite well—and certainly more than any job I’ve had before.

It’s also just really amazing to be able to earn an income that is reliant on me. 90% is out of my control in the sense that I don’t control the economy, the Fed, the stock market, etc., but I get to make decisions around which trades/investments to enter and close. This level of autonomy around decision-making is really refreshing after a decade of being told what to do by 3-5 layers of management above me. Of course there are drawbacks. There’s a ton more risk and my income is solely dependent on what I’m doing. If I enter a bad trade, don’t manage risk properly, etc. the downfall is all mine. Also, this is not passive income in the sense that I’m doing absolutely nothing and money just comes in. Especially before I went to Korea, I was at my desk for 6+ hours a day to watch the markets, get a sense for price action, but also to instill a sense of seriousness and discipline to my work. I wanted to treat it like a real “job” by creating a daily schedule and sense of routine. While I was in Korea, I wasn’t working more than an hour or two a day given the time difference and it also made me realize that the short-term day/swing trading portion of this work is an active income stream that requires time at the desk like any other office job.

All in all, I’ve been enjoying this journey a lot and am learning so much about human psychology, my own emotional tendencies, the economy, and financial markets. I feel excited because this is the first time in a while that I’m experiencing an overlap of interests, skills, and my personal demeanor—while making money. I am someone who enjoys independent work, studying and learning, and ultimately making decisions for myself. I’m also just a lot more confident and comfortable with my new work identity as a trader/investor, which is something I really struggled with when I was first considering this choice. Something so risky, undefined, and unattached from any organized establishment made this work and title feel illegitimate and undesirable. I have learned that most people really don’t care. If they do, it’s because they wish they could do it and are jealous or have their own work-identity issues. Even more importantly, I don’t care what they think. Those people are not going to live my life for me and so their opinions don’t matter.

Enjoying this work by no means equates it to being a life purpose. I see this like any other job that provides a certain means to an end, except this way happens to be a lot more pleasant and manageable than any other 9-5 job I’ve had. For the first time, I’m making a living that doesn’t feel like it’s actively killing my body and soul. In the background, I’ve been developing a personal mission thesis that my desire to make a lot of money comes from a place of wanting to do good with that money. I just posted about this on Instagram—about whether or not I should want to be more ambitious because I can. This thought popped up in my head as I was walking around my parents’ neighborhood, where I’m pretty sure everyone is a millionaire (just based on house prices alone). Should I aim to live in a neighborhood like this with a multimillion dollar some home? Should I work harder to have some of those luxuries that seem like such basic components of a wealthy existence? For now, I’ve realized I’m not motivated by living in a giant home or driving a fancy car. There isn’t enough of a desire for these things to really push me to earn the kind of money that you need to be able to comfortably afford that kind of lifestyle.

I believe that I can grow my current portfolio to meaningful wealth over the next couple of decades and I want to succeed—not because I want to live in a huge home but because I want to do good with that money. There are lots of causes and people I’d love to support including women and children in poor countries, maintaining natural ecosystems, preserving ancient Korean art forms that are dying out, and enabling older adults to live with dignity in their senior years. I believe in my integrity and sense of self-awareness to be a conscious steward of capital, which I don’t think most philanthropists today are. There is a lot wrong with philanthropy as a construct and so part of exploring this personal thesis will be figuring out ways to do good outside the traditional scheme of donating for tax breaks.

To wrap up, I still have no idea what the future hold beyond the next few months (even this is unknown), but I feel less need to know. This, in and of itself, is a sign of evolving into the person I know I am and am meant to be.